History of 9th December 2010

today is the date i broke up with him..

its not because of bored.. but i think he misunderstood it..

i got my reasons.. ive got into my senses.. couple is not good for us.. it only leads us to make more sins.. im grateful that i have this book titled 'Wahai Remaja Kembaramu Bermula di Sini' by Prof. Dr. Sidek Baba.. the book that opened my eyes.. i want to be close to Allah s.w.t.. more n more..

i opened the chapter called 'love' a.k.a 'cinta'.. ive realised that... i did not fulfill 3 needs of love in my live..
          1) my love to Allah s.w.t.. when my love to Allah s.w.t. is sincere.. then, my love for a person is sincere..
          2) my love for my parents.. i know that i am really cared about my dad.. but i think that is not enought..
          3) my love for knowledge.. i still didnt achieve this love..
          4) last but not least.. my love for a person.. that is something that i shouldnt have before i fulfill all the three needs..

n now im aware that.. love in adolescene is just because of 'lust' a.k.a. 'nafsu'.. n i dont want to have that kind of love..

i dont want a love that doesnt have the blessing of Allah s.w.t.. im sorry but to say.. i rather lose u than losing Allah s.w.t.'s blessings..

remember.. althought we close our 'aurat'.. but still.. zina mata, zina hati, cannot be repelled in a couple.. and a boy/man that took care of the girl/woman's honour (by not even lay a finger on her) is the one that trully sinscere n not because of 'lust'..

hopefully i will find a man that fulfill all the three needs of love when the time that i fulfill all the three of it..

n for u.. may u find other that are more better than me.. InsyaAllah.. Amin~..